As part of their campaign, Dove released research on the types of compliments we give to kids at an age when they're forming their identities. For girls, 87% of compliments are about appearance, while boys are most praised for bravery and athletic achieve
In 87 percent of cases, compliments for girls focus on how pretty they are, what they're wearing, and their style. Compliments about character traits like courage, skill, or perseverance make up only four percent of the compliments for girls. For boys, it's 55 percent. The second most common compliments for boys are about sports performance and achievements, praised in 37 percent of cases, but only in nine percent for girls.
The type of qualities we encourage in kids through compliments varies by region. In the Moravian-Silesian Region, girls are almost exclusively praised for their appearance (97 percent of the time). In Zlín, girls are complimented for things other than appearance most often (28%), and in the Hradec Králové Region (18%).
Psychologist and confidence project advocate Andrea Antalová explains why.
“As a society, we're used to praising girls mainly for their looks because power, performance, and competence were historically associated with men, while femininity was reduced to attractiveness and softness. These patterns are passed down through generations, reinforced by advertising, film, and social media, and cemented by educational stereotypes from childhood. That's why it's important to consciously expand compliments to include abilities and character, so the value of girls and women isn't based on how they look, but on who they are. Abilities and character create a more stable foundation of self-worth than appearance alone. When we appreciate these traits, we support healthy confidence, growth, and inner certainty—without the pressure for perfection.”
Recognizing character and abilities is more meaningful for women than compliments about appearance
Women also say they remember compliments about their character and abilities the most. These are more meaningful to them than compliments about appearance. Research shows we are aware of this inequality. 72 percent of people in the Czech Republic feel that society links the value of girls primarily with their appearance. At the same time, 94 percent believe that girls would gain confidence if society praised them more for their abilities.
This is especially crucial at an age when children and adolescents are forming their own identity and vision of who they are.
“The words children hear shape their inner voice. If girls are only praised for their looks, they learn to believe their value is tied to appearance,” explains psychologist Šárka Kučerová, expert on the Confidence Project, under which Dove has long been active. “Then any change in appearance (age, acne, illness) can significantly impact self-esteem," adds Antalová.
The Confidence Project suggests a simple test: Before giving a compliment next time, imagine a man instead of a woman, a boy instead of a girl—and vice versa. Before expressing another wish (not just for International Women's Day), pause and articulate what you truly appreciate about the women and girls—like their courage, perseverance, humor, empathy, or the work they do. Those kinds of compliments stick with them.
